The very last drawing in my cancer exhibit series was a new me rising out of the body of cancer me. Its title is ‘Human Again.’
Since then, I’ve eschewed my old bookkeeping ways and have instead been working on my music, my writing, my art, and more broadly, my self. Trying to answer the question, ‘What am I?’ As if I had been remiss all the years before cancer, and had forgotten to work on the thing that I should have been by now, and wasn’t.
What should I be?
The theme of the exhibit was originally going to be ‘risk’ but I realized, when all of my ideas included a significant element of fear, that I wanted this new phase of existence to be done with that. Pre-cancer me had fear. Fear of consequences. Fear of failure. New me rejects that impediment, guards against its creeping back in from a lifetime of habit.
So this exhibit is about potential, not risk.